From serious to silly to sweet, here is a mishmash of five things I didn’t expect to do as a midlife expat.

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1. Stay home drinking wine and watching CNN Portugal all day. OK, yeah, staying home and drinking wine may have fallen within the realm of expectations. Sure. But staying glued to the TV following a surprising corruption probe that led to the resignation of Prime Minister António Costa this week and a decision to dissolve parliament? Nope. Did not expect that. And, honestly, didn’t really expect to care all that much. But I do.

President Marcelo Rebelo de Sousa spoke to the nation last night to announce his decision to dissolve parliament and hold a general election on March 10. The president said parliament would be dissolved after lawmakers pass Portugal’s 2024 budget, which is expected to be approved at the end of this month.

The budget calls for lower personal income tax rates and a higher minimum wage rate, among other measures, and projects a budget surplus for the second year in a row. The draft budget was approved in parliament last week by Costa’s majority-holding PS party. All eight other parties voted against it.

The budget also calls for an end to the existing NHR immigrant tax-relief program in 2024, though expats who’ve already received NHR status (like me) will keep it for the 10-year duration. This change, and the increase in minimum wage, will impact future expats. Residency Visa applicants must have at least one year’s minimum wage deposited in a Portuguese bank account, so the amount of cash required will increase if the budget passes as expected.

A new government also leaves questions for current and future expats. The center-right, number-two PSD party could come out on top in the March election, but probably without the absolute majority now enjoyed by Costa’s PS party. This may mean a necessary alliance with the far-right Chega party, the distant third-largest force in parliament. The Chega (Enough!) party is ultra-nationalist and anti-immigration (sound familiar?)

Stay tuned.

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2. While I’m on the subject of elections… I never expected I’d fly back to visit the United States and get my 91-year-old mother her medical marijuana card. Then, who’d have imagined spending three afternoons experimenting edible weed dosages with Mom? Yep. That happened. Just hangin’, watchin’ Netflix, and tearin’ up every big-ass, family-size bag of crunchy Cheetohs, greasy kettle chips, and spicy Doritos we I could get my hands on. What does this have to do with elections? Ohio voters this week passed a bill legalizing recreational marijuana. Man. I could have saved my $189. For the medical marijuana card. Not all the bags of munchables.

(AND… Just a shout-out to my birth state for also voting to guarantee abortion rights. Ohio is one of only seven states in the U.S. to do this, so far. This is shocking since Ohio made international news for forcing a 10-year-old rape victim to leave the state to get an abortion.)

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3. Zipping back to my new home in Portugal, and moving on to lighter stuff, I never thought I’d be shopping Black Friday here! I hate shopping, and avoided Black Friday day-after-Thanksgiving bullshit in the States like the plague. Who knew that Portugal, where Thanksgiving Day does not exist, goes all out for Black Friday? I just snagged some sweet deals on furniture from La Redoute, a French retailer that ships to Portugal.

Fortunately, I appear to now be off the Continente…um…toy promo list, after nearly a year of my inadvertent search history following me around. When I first arrived here, my translation app caused me to type something in Continente’s online search box, while I was signed in to my account, and I got product results for anal pleasure rings instead of the shower curtain rings I was searching for.

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4. Speaking of toys… I did not expect to have fun with a 40-something French surfing instructor; a 50-something Parisian-Portuguese farmer/business-owner/kink aficionado; a 40-something Angolan-Portuguese entrepreneur/racecar driver; and a 60-something Swedish retiree and sex addict my first year here. Seriously. You cannot make this shit up. Then, at the start of my second year as a solo expat, I absolutely didn’t think I’d meet and exclusively date a wonderful 60-something Portuguese retiree who doesn’t speak English but is fluent in the universal language of love. Ahh…o meu querido.

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5. Fall in love serious like with myself. This is huge, and I’ve written about it since I first started blogging in 2021. As midlife women, learning to like, appreciate, take care of, and be kind to ourselves is a journey of baby steps. Silencing the negative chatter from our inner critic. Relaxing into our own rhythm.  Embracing who and how we are without apology. Treating ourselves like a best friend. I started deliberately working toward this goal when I turned 60, and I’ve made good progress. I didn’t expect my progress to be so apparent to me as a solo immigrant creating a new life for myself in a new country.

When I visited the U.S. in September, my strengthened self-acceptance and self-love positively impacted my interactions with others. Yes, I still falter and backtrack, of course, but I can feel the enduring change, and that has changed how I relate to and communicate with those close to me. One evening during my visit, I was in my mother’s family room talking and laughing with my son and his girlfriend. My mother shushed me. Since I was a child, she has always admonished me for laughing too loudly. I don’t believe a child’s laughter can ever be too loud. This time, at 63, I said, “No, Mom. You shush. You don’t get to tell me to shush anymore. I’m laughing. I’m happy. There’s no such thing as too-loud happiness.”

At least I think that’s what I told her.

We were both high.

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“Create a life you do not have to take a vacation from.”

Unknown

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Thank you for reading! 💜 May you find joy in the unexpected this weekend.

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The Hot Goddess

Instagram: retired_rewired_inspired

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