the hot goddess

4 Reasons NOT to Move to Portugal

Multiple media outlets have reported huge surges in visa inquiries from U.S. citizens wanting to move abroad after the November 2024 election. No surprise there.

It’s also not surprising that Portugal continues to be a top country of interest for U.S. citizens seeking to emigrate from the United States of America. Portugal consistently ranks among the top 10 safest countries in the world and top 10 countries with the best quality of life in the world, making it an attractive country for potential immigrants. I am living and loving my dream life here on Portugal’s Silver Coast.

Let’s be clear, though. There has been an alarming increase in far-right nationalist rhetoric in Portugal and other European countries. Anti-immigrant sentiment, for example, is certainly not limited to America. Nor is racism. A number of European Union countries, including Portugal, have seen surprising gains by far-right political parties in recent elections.

This week’s unexpected fall of Portugal’s center-right government — the country’s third government collapse in three years — “marks the worst spell of political instability in 50 years of Portuguese democracy,“ according to the Associated Press. After dissolving parliament for the second time since I’ve lived here, Portugal’s president set another snap parliamentary election for May 18. It remains to be seen what, if any, alliances and gains will be made by the country’s rising far-right political party. But even in the face of this development, the current political climate here in Portugal doesn’t even come close to being as frightening and chaotic as it currently is in the U.S.

Political views notwithstanding, though, there are important personal reasons one should not move abroad. I’ve witnessed four of these in action, and have seen their resulting aftermath during my last two-and-a-half years of living abroad as a solo midlife American expat and retiree. So, for what it’s worth, here’s my advice.

Do NOT move to Portugal or any other country to:

1. Save a marriage.

2. Escape drama.

3. Create a Little America haven in a different country.

4. Find utopia.

Saving a Marriage

Just as some married couples look to having a baby to save their troubled unions, some other, older couples wonder if a fresh start in a new country will revive a faltering marriage. One spouse might want the move more than the other, but the other eventually agrees in hopes of keeping the marriage alive. After making the big move abroad, though, the marriage ends in divorce. In my relatively short time living here, I’ve met three expat married couples who went on to face this sad ending shortly following their relocation to Portugal. I’ve heard of, but don’t personally know, another two expat married couples going through the same wrenching experience after their move. Now, maybe a couple’s move abroad will save a troubled marriage. I don’t know the statistics. What I do know is that one cannot count on Portugal or any country to save one’s marriage.

Escaping Drama

I’ve seen this all over. Folks with issues move overseas in an attempt to escape the drama their issues created. But they don’t realize or accept that their issues are what causes the drama. So they bring their issues with them and end up making the same bad decisions and creating the same drama in their new country. Handle your shit before you move. Do the work. Invest the time. Believe me, I know it’s not easy. But it is crucial to creating a drama-free life wherever you move.

Creating Little America

Ugh. I probably unfairly categorize all these expats as Trumpers. I don’t know their politics. I only know they are keen on creating a mirror image of their lives in the United States, but with better weather, prettier views, and cheaper prices. They defiantly refuse to even try to learn just the most basic Portuguese greetings. They move to developments and circulate within areas that are populated by other U.S. citizens. They complain about the food, the culture, the government, and the procedures of their new country. They move here and then constantly gripe about how different it is from what they were used to in the U.S. These are the folks who eventually move back. Not because of unforeseen circumstances or family developments, but because life here wasn’t what they expected. It wasn’t like America. Duh, people.

Finding Utopia

Yeah. Sorry, y’all. Utopia does not exist. There are no perfect countries. There are countries that might be perfect for you. Countries that will meet your needs better than other countries. Countries where you will feel more content, more at ease, just plain happier. But no place is perfect. No government is perfect. OK, some are definitely more fucked up than others, but none is perfect. Don’t move abroad expecting to find perfection in the ideal country.

Celebrating Carnaval in Portugal last week

I love Portugal and my life here. Good times! There are many reasons to move to this beautiful country. But Portugal isn’t for everyone. Moving abroad isn’t for everyone. Make sure you’re considering it for the right reasons and with well-informed, reasonable expectations.

Thank you for reading! ❤️ May your weekend find you content in your space, wherever that is.

All images are my own.

The Hot Goddess

Instagram: retired_rewired_inspired

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32 comments

  1. Great advice! Geographical cures mostly don’t work, and if they appear to work at first, it’s usually for the short-term. Who we are goes with us, we don’t leave it behind.

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  3. Very, very, very important advice, Natalie. One needs to embrace one’s new environment and culture to succeed. We should do that even when we travel for short periods of time. That’s what it’s all about, learning about everything the world has to offer.

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  5. “Create a Little America haven in a different country. ” This is SO true. Americans are pushing the prices up as they throw money around like confetti. Sorry. Just because something is cheap compared to what it is back home it is because wages in Portugal are very low. Immigrants of ALL nationalities are pushing the cost of living up for Portuguese so I understand the anger by the indeginous Portuguese. The Brits are also guilty of living in expat ghettos. Where we live I am not surrounded by Portuguese but by Dutch, German, Spanish, Italian, English, Sweedish, French and American. I could be anywhere..

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    • Yes, wealthy foreigners from many different countries have led to soaring real estate prices in areas of Portugal. From my observation, many don’t even occupy these properties as residents. I made a point of moving to an area where my neighbors are local Portuguese folks, and English is not widely spoken. My landlord is Portuguese, and my nextdoor neighbors don’t speak English. But all the construction of pricey new beach homes is surely going to change the mix, sadly.

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  6. Your cautions are excellent. I have seen some spectacular fails when people have tried to save a relationship by getting married or having a baby or even just moving within the United States. Kill your snakes first!

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  7. I’ve always dreamt of living in another country far far away and starting over again since I was a little girl which sounds wonderful and also especially now with our ridiculously scary and dangerous trump administration happening at the moment. 😦 But those are excellent reasons to consider moving before doing so. That’s so great that your dream came true. I have visited Lisbon and Porto and it did feel like home there to me and the people are so warm and friendly and the food is amazing so in that regard, you can say Portugal is perfect for ME! Hopefully one day it’ll happen. 🙂

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  8. I like your last point—there are no perfect countries. There are plenty of great people in America, but it saddens me how our culture still hasn’t learned previous lessons and continues to scapegoat entire groups of people.

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  9. Such great grounded wisdom. Personally, I love #2. Wherever you go, your sh!t goes with you! Love your statement to do our work. Exactly!! So glad you are enjoying life on the Silver Coast. You make it look amazing!!

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  10. The “not” approach is a different writing perspective from your travels. 👍🏻 Great share, as you do and always a delight to see your beautiful smiling face! Best to you, Natalie. 🌺

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    • Thank you, my beautiful friend ❤️. Yes, you’re right. Taking a negative perspective is different, and I considered not posting this, but some recent events spurred me on 🫣. I’m happy you enjoyed the share. 😊

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      • It’s helpful and thought-provoking to learn about things from different perspectives and angles and sometimes we can learn more about what is by learning what it’s not. 👍🏻 Thank you! 🦋

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  12. Love your honest and no-nonsense advice, Natalie. It speaks to this philosophical idea, “And remember, no matter where you go, there you are.”

    I’ve lived in my second home for almost 17 years now, and I’ve seen some unsettling changes in these past few years, though I still love my life here and rather be here than anywhere else.

    People, particularly young people back home in South Africa, rarely heed my advice that things aren’t always better elsewhere. But then, as they say, seeing is believing. Maybe the experience of moving, and finding out the chosen destination is not for you, is itself a valuable lesson.

    Thank you for taking the time to write this educational article. I’ll wholeheartedly point those seeking to settle elsewhere to it.

    And oh, one day you need to write that book, Natalie… No pressure! 🙂 ❤

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    • Thank you so much for this insightful share, Khaya ❤️. I love the quotation! Definitely speaks to my experiences, that’s for sure. Your advice as one who moved from South Africa to Finland is invaluable and worth heeding. And this: “Maybe the experience of moving, and finding out the chosen destination is not for you, is itself a valuable lesson.” Truth!
      Wishing you a beautiful week, Khaya 💖

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  15. Spot on, Natalie. I agree with everything and saw them during my three years in Belgium. “Creating Little America,” OMG. This is problem number one for many Americans living abroad. Not wanting to integrate and learn the language is problematic. I hate to say this, but those are the main reasons many Europeans don’t like having Americans in their countries. While Europeans learn several languages, many Americans believe they are special and refuse to learn the language of the country they are in. Great post, my friend, and I love your máscara.

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    • Exactly! You put it well, Edward, and, sadly, other countries’ distaste for “arrogant Americans” is getting worse with the current political climate in the U.S. I almost feel sorry for those who deprive themselves of the personal enrichment that comes from immersing oneself in a different culture.
      Thank you for your comments and for sharing your experience. And I’m glad you like my máscara de Carnaval 😄🎉

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