the hot goddess

Word of the Year, Portugal Style

Are you a word of the year, or “WOTY,” person? I’m not, really, though I’ve tried. I have too many commitment issues (aka attention deficit) to pick just one word, remember what it is, and then stick with it for a whole year.

As an American solo immigrant and full retiree living my best expat life in Portugal, I do have many Portuguese words I love and which resonate with me. But I simply cannot choose just one to hang out with for the duration of 2024. They all inspire me, motivate me, and give me something to strive for. Like pronouncing them or conjugating them correctly. Or, sometimes, they just crack me up.

My current fave is constipação. When namorado told me his son had been sick with bad constipação around the holidays, I asked what he thought caused it. Something he ate? Too many rich desserts, maybe? Some medication he took? When namorado responded that everyone in his son’s office was constipação after they all volunteered to plant trees in a park in the rain, I was like, huh? Surely, this must be some country-ass Portuguese old wives’ tale nonsense about trees and rain causing constipation, I thought. It was a good 10 minutes of back and forth bungled Portuguese before I realized constipação DOES NOT mean constipation. Nope. It means…get this…a COLD. Obstrução is the Portuguese word for constipation, namorado informed me through snorts of laughter.

Constipação is the word used when someone has the common cold (which, sorry, you still don’t get from rain and trees). Gripe is the word for flu. Infeção sinusal is sinus infection, and sento como merda is feel like shit. I’ve had all four of these lovelies come and go and come back again for much of January. And some of the comprimidos do cause an obstrução issue, even when I’m not planting trees in the rain. Comprimidos is Portuguese for pills. I continually confuse this word with the word for lengths (comprimentos) and the word for complementary (complementos). Probably because I would go to any comprimentos to get some complementos comprimidos. But I draw the line at wet tree-planting.

Swear words like merda, of course, make my favorite words list. Foda…merda…o que raio. These all were memorized before I even landed here. As you know, I swear like a sailor — another indication of my high intelligence, according to experts. Total bullshit, obviously.

I vote for phrases of the year, too. I’m too sick as of this writing to think of another “t” word so I can create the awesomely apt acronym “POTTY.” Let’s just roll with Phrase of the This Year. Or Merda. Whatever.

Anyhoo, my 2024-ish Portuguese POTTY is mais ou menos. It means “more or less” and is never a good thing. Usually more “less” than “more.” Last year, when I was renting a car for a friend to drive me two-plus hours north to my SEF immigration appointment, the Portuguese guy who owned the small car rental shop told me never to trust anyone who said mais ou menos. When I returned the car and he asked if the gas tank was full, I said, “Sim, mais ou menos.” I knew better than to try saying that during my SEF interview, because experts have deemed me intelligent AF. But I love using this phrase as much as possible in daily conversation, since it makes me think I sound like a local. Mais ou menos.

Encontrar. This word can mean to find, to meet, or to date. All the stages of the online dating process! Reminds me of the English word enchant, which I like as a WOTY contender. A year of enchantment sounds pretty awesome, right?

Faíscas. Sparks. What you hope for when you encontrar someone. Another strong contender. 2024: my year of creating sparks and sparkling in all I do. Yeah! Let’s make some magic this year!

Talvez. Portuguese for maybe. This is right up there with mais ou menos and I say it all the time. “O ano das faíscas…talvez.” The year of sparks…maybe.

Comunicação. This word is very easy to remember the meaning of, but not easy to do as a language learner. Communication is a special struggle when you’re dating someone who doesn’t speak your language and you suck at speaking his. Take the following incident, which I previously shared with author Kathy Garland in response to a comment she made on this post. This snippet was part of a much larger and longer conversation that I think may be the healthiest, most helpful conversation I’ve had as two people — from different countries or not — try to get to know each other in a romantic relationship. The conversation addressed the huge issue of personal space and alone time, after we had spent a million years six days and six nights together. Remember, I am still, at my core, this person.

And this person

And this person:

ME (when he starts talking in Portuguese about some YouTube video he wants me to watch while I’m at his home trying to read Kathy’s book on my phone, after we’ve agreed to some mutual “me time”): “Por favor, não agora. Estou ainda a tentar ler.” (Not now, please. I am still trying to read.) My best effort at trying to say this. And let me point out that I never interrupt him by launching a conversation when he is reading, working, or doing anything on his phone. Just saying. If it’s important, I always ask, “Com licença, podes falar agora?” Excuse me, can you talk now? This is important me-time protocol that he also appreciates. Because when you don’t speak each other’s language, just talking is not fast and easy. It’s work. It can be frustrating and tiring, and sometimes a linguistics break is helpful.


HIM: “Blah blah blah…telemóvel…blah blah” (Something about me being on my cell phone. I think.)


ME: “Querido, só estou a ler.” (Dear, I am just reading.) All-wrong grammar, but, hey.


HIM: “Blah blah blah estou…blah blah” (I think he is correcting my grammar.) Here is where I should come with a warning label.


ME: Silence. I am reading. I am also thinking, “O que raio?” (What the hell?). OK, it was actually more like, “WTFoda?”


HIM: “Querida? Blah blah jantar blah blah…” (Dear?...OK, now I think maybe he is saying something about making dinner or eating dinner. I start to soften, but then think it could also be some damn idiom about the bounty of life or some merda I will never get, despite my high intelligence. Foda it.)


ME: Silence. Reading.


HIM: “OK.”


ME: Look up from reading and give him an air kiss. Positive reinforcement is essential during his behavior training.


HIM:  Walks over to the sofa where I’m sitting and gives me an actual kiss. Several little kisses on my forehead and side of my face. He can’t get to my mouth because I am now looking down, back to reading. “I love you, querida.”


ME: Feel like the biggest asshole ever. “Eu também, querido.” (Me too, dear.) Said with eye contact and a sincere smile. Positive reinforcement is essential during my behavior training.

That’s it. I’m picking comunicação as my WOTY. This is the word that will guide my growth and goals for the entire year!

Talvez.

Mais ou menos.

Thank you for reading! ❤️ May your day be filled with words that make you smile.

Featured image is my own.

The Hot Goddess

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47 comments

  3. Bom Dia Natalie,
    Que Sera Sera. Life’s too precious to allow some language to wreck a good thang. Especially when he is so darn cute.
    Really enjoyed this one and still laughing.
    Muito Obrigada.

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  4. Thanks for all the words, laughs, and smiles Natalie. Not being able to communicate would be very hard for me as it is near the top of my want list for a relationship. I can relate to your struggle to choose just one word and love your process of picking POTTY words, mais or menos. 😋

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  6. Totally enjoy each post.❤️❤️❤️ your straight talk …. Great communication! No guessing games😀Keep up the great work. Can’t wait to read what’s coming next. Tchau,
    👋

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  8. omgosh Natalie, you never fail to bring a smile to my face! Even when talking about ‘colds’ or constipation!! LOL Communication is so important, hopefully your namorado is learning a few english words too ❤

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  9. LOL, the trials and tribulations of trying to communicate with someone in another language… I have made my share of mistakes too. Very funny after it is figured out!

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  16. Love it with the homonyms. (at least to us they are) Comprimidos are Pills! I would never get that, sounds like compromise to me. Thanks for the laugh. I asked a Chilean friend if he wanted to do a language exchange. He found that hysterically funny. I seemed to have mistaken lengua (tongue) for idioma (language).

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  17. First of all, I can’t believe you are/were reading my book on your phone! Did that work out? Also, thank you 💕

    I think I need to commit this phrase to memory “sento como merda.” Maybe it’ll get me out of some things lol

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    • Ha! I do nearly everything on my phone, including writing and blogging for some reason, even though I do own a laptop and an iPad. Easy for me to swipe back and do screenshots — which I did as I read your powerful story, in small bites. (I listened to you. Needed to take breaks to process my personal shit.)
      And speaking of “shit”… “Sento como merda” is a mug waiting to happen. 😁

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