Solo woman seeking authenticity

Authenticity? Get Real

What does it mean to be authentic? To live authentically? To embrace and exude authenticity as a person, a leader, a woman?

Genuine…legitimate…credible?

Social media are overflowing with “authenticity” hashtags. It’s a higher calling. For me, it’s just being myself, unfiltered and unconcerned about others’ opinions and expectations of me. But social media belies the whole premise of authenticity, doesn’t it? With highly curated, filtered, and staged content designed to reflect trends and push a brand/narrative/story/message, the social statements we’re making/posting are more packaged than authentic.

So, this is me in translation, making Authenticity Adjustments to be fully genuine, legitimate, and credible. Back in the day, I called this act of revealing one’s genuine self “Personality Leakage,” but now here we go, jumping on the “#authenticity” train.

Social Statement, Pre-Translation: “I practice Gratitude daily, starting every morning with Meditation, and embracing every day with Grace and a Big Smile.”

Authenticity Adjustment: 89.7% of the time now my big smile really is genuine. I’m happy and thankful as hell for everything. The other 10.3% I’m actually thinking “What the f*ck!,” “Bitch, please,” or “F*ck off”/”Go f*ck yourself”. I have a swearing problem IRL.

Social Statement, Pre-Translation: “I am an ageless goddess, living fully in the moment, practicing self-care of the temple that is my body and mind.”

Authenticity Adjustment: I am losing my mind. Who the hell still has searing hot flashes and gross-ass night sweats every goddamn day and night when they’re pushing 61 damn years old? When’s the last time I slept at night? I think I’m getting Alzheimer’s. Did my grown son just tell me that watching me go from sitting to standing is like watching Transformers? F*ck off, dear (Big Smile). Did I just pee when I coughed/sneezed/laughed? Yeeaahhh, that queef was an actual fart. Sorry. (Big Smile with Gratitude)

Social Statement, Pre-Translation: “The book Eat, Pray, Love was transformational, and influenced my solo trip around the world.”

Authenticity Adjustment: Uh, yeah, not really, no. When I need to “find myself” I tend to lean toward the more accessible, expedient, and well practiced Drink, Swear, Screw approach. Then I Eat.

Social Statement, Pre-Translation: “I lead a fit, healthy, active, positive lifestyle of discovery, wonder, and lifelong learning.”

Authenticity Adjustment: What the actual f*ck?

21 comments

  1. […] 1. Avoid shopping in stores, even before Covid. I hate shopping in big stores. They’re always crowded and I get discombobulated by all the noise and stimulation, which take my energy level down to zero. Amazon and Instacart to the rescue. If I absolutely must go into a store I look for a small one, or, thanks to the pandemic, shop during the dedicated “senior shopping” hours for those of us 60 and older. (Though, why in the hell they think we shop at 7 AM I don’t know.) You need to be careful using this option, however, if you’re just running in to pick up some vermouth, vodka, and Vaseline. And don’t even think about putting a bottle of Astroglide in your cart during senior shopping hours. I felt so guilty and judged that I threw in a can of evaporated milk and a bag of dried beans as decoys, then conspicuously displayed my Golden Buckeye Senior card in the checkout line (which is not even required), just to prove I had the right to early-shop for my essentials, too. (F*ck off, with Big Smile) […]

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